everyone’s grandparents seem to have really cute stories of how they met, and like my grandparents met when my grandma was running away from police during a protest and she jumped on the back of my grandads motorcycle and just screamed “DRIVE FUCKING DRIVE”
I dunno man I think that story’s pretty fuckin cute.
when you remember something embarrassing you did 6 years ago
The thing about horror movie situations is imma do my best to help you but if we running and you fallin or we hidin and you whimperin and sobbin, that’s it! I can’t do nothing else for you! You have made the choice to be a damsel in distress and boo this ain’t Camelot I have 0 time to die
my mom always throws old clothes that she has nothing to do with in my closet, and whenever i call her out on it, she says “i have never done that, all of the clothes in your closet are yours”
are you sure mom
are you sure these are my clothes
choking on water is the worst because how do you stop choking? drink something? well ive got some bad news for you
'Dont I get a hug' most cringeworthy line
Also, fun fact: being nice to someone you hate does NOT make you two faced
it makes you a mature adult who knows when to pick their battles and when to just let it go and tolerate someone for their shitty personality.
if you think otherwise grow up
SO MANY PEOPLE TO SHOW THIS TO IT ACTUALLY HURTS ME